I got a statement from my insurance company of all the charges associated with my surgery.

I laughed through all eight pages of it.

Then I nearly split my gut when I saw the total.

$31,800.

And I had no complications. None. I sailed right through, and it was nearly $32,000.

See what I mean? I am giggling just thinking of it.

~*~

I took my kids to Burger King for lunch. I even went into the restaurant with them. It did smell heavenly and I admit that the banner for the new omlette breakfast looked delicious. But I didn't eat any of it. Not a bite.

I feel like I have to push myself now, test my limits myself before they get tested by someone else. The holidays may be the biggest test of all, but I am so far looking forward to my pureed ham, green beans and mashed potatoes. Mmmm, four whole tablespoons.

I feel really great lately. I wake up better than I have in years and have NO back pain. That alone makes this whole process worthwhile. I don't have that mid-afternoon sugar/caffiene crash that I normally had.

I also keep feeling my face. I can feel my jawline and cheekbones. My eye sockets are so ... bony to me. It is as if my fingers do not recognize the contours of my own face any more.

I knew it looked thinner, but as I was scrapbooking last night, I came across a photo I had taken with my son in late October. At the time I thought, "That's a halfway decent picture!" and was very pleased. But when I grabbed that photo out of the pile I literally gasped. My face looked so pudgy! The contrast was really startling.

One more day of liquids. One more day of liquids.

I am excited to move on to more solid foods but also, I feel like the 'other shoe' is going to drop at any minute and I will start feeling badly or have a horrible reaction to a certain food. I am planning on staying simple: an egg for breakfast, some ricotta cheese for lunch, and chicken for dinner. Nothing fancy, nothing I didn't like before surgery. But it seems all I hear about are people who had problems with food. A lot of them seem to start out on pureed or even solids a lot earlier than I am. It sort of scares me to hear about them eating regular food at 1 week post op. It makes me wonder if they had just a surgeon or a whole team like I had. The therapist, nutritionist and the whole staff have been really great, with really detailed instructions on what and how to eat. I'm proud to say I've stuck to them to the letter. It isn't often I get to say that about food.

We are also having people over on New Year's Eve and I am looking forward to it. I won't be able to munch all night but I can definately enjoy some things like this fabulous spinach dip I am going to make. Yes, I'll only have a tablespoon but if I can watch my kids eating burgers and fries and not have any, I can certainly enjoy an evening with friends.

ciao - 08 July 2005
Give Us Candor - 29 June 2005
Not even Johnny Depp is better than sleep - 26 June 2005
breathe - 25 June 2005
the joy of pepsi... or something - 22 June 2005

Before and After

current entry // past entries // profile // notes // sign // photo // design // host